Midnight Shadow
by chex-x
Summary: Edward's take starting after he think's Bellas is dead. Reviews are appreiciated...:D
1. Decisions of Grief

Trembling, I fell back against the wall, unaware of the phone slipping from my numb fingers, oblivious to the cracking sound it emitted as it collided with the gravel. I was completely unaware of everything around me, for all my thoughts revolved around her.

I shook my head in attempt of somehow erasing her visage, but my halfhearted tries were in vain. It was impossible to forget her, and as her perfect face swam before me, immense grief came with it. It immersed me as I traced the contours of her gentle half smile, remembered just how smooth her milky skin appeared, and lost myself, just as I always did, in her wide, loving chocolate brown eyes. It was then, in the midst of this reminiscence, that the reality truly and totally incapacitated me. She was gone. I tried to take a breath out of habit, but it proved impossible. I leaned my head between my knees, but nothing could save me from the ocean I was drowning in. It was almost too much to bear, hell it _was_ too much to bear.

There was no coming back from this, it was one thing, my living apart from her, my attempts of keeping her safe, but the thought of living without her, living in a world _void_ of her, was incomprehensible. I couldn't exist without her. She was my life, is my life, if her life ceased to exist, then my life would be what it had become, an empty shell. A vast wasteland of misery and grief, a sentence much worse than death. Death, oh, the thought came so sweetly, nothing compared to the idea of a release from this hell. A release from this torturous pain, this horrendous grief and guilt that came with losing the center of my existence. I couldn't live without her. I wouldn't live without her.

I sat up against the wall, and opened my eyes. The decision was made. It had been made for years now really. It was set determination that hoisted me off of the ground and carried me to the end of the alleyway. It was my last attempt at proving my love to her, to somehow reverse this terrible wrong, to set things straight. It was my love for Bella that sent the cell phone into the trash can and myself into the arms of the Volturi, hoping for them to release me from this hell.


	2. Eye of the Storm

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Twilight-frowns- Everything belongs to Stephenie Meyer**

**...**

It was pure and utter torture as I sat, waiting. Leaning back against the rough worn fabric of my seat,  
I gripped the armrests of my prison, willing for the plane to move at a faster pace. But my wishes came  
to no avail, and the flight continued on at a torturously slow rate.

At least, before the flight, there were tickets to buy, and plans to make, giving me something to occupy  
my attention with, insignificant matters to tempt a distraction out of me. Now however, there was no release,  
no petty human diversions to enfold myself in, nowhere to escape to.

_  
Only her face staring back at me. _

I shook my head, but nothing could erase the grief from my mind. Nothing could eliminate the burden  
of my mistakes from my shoulders, the immense guilt that consumed my being, the despair that accompanied  
remembering her eyes, her beautiful warm eyes that would never meet mine again.

I gripped the edge of my seat trying to brace myself against the pain that ripped through my chest.  
The pain that had relentlessly coursed through me ever since I had left, the pain that had managed to increase  
tenfold since the previous night, the night of my demise.

My head collided with the overhead compartment as the plane landed roughly against the ground, finally giving  
me a distraction to latch onto, and a life line to temporarily save me from my sea of despair.

As soon as the plane came to a stop, I rushed from my seat, hurrying down the aisle and leaping out of  
the door. I struggled to keep a human pace as I traveled through the terminal, willing my legs with all my might  
not to break into a sprint, not to fly out in a fine frenzy, carrying me to my release.

It took almost all of my self control to try to maintain inconspicuous as I headed out of sliding glass doors  
into the dark dense night. At the edge of the parking lot, stood a deep rolling forest, the only thing standing  
in the way of my goal, the last trivial task I had to conquer.

I took a quick glance over my shoulder, checking the area for onlookers, and upon finding nothing but mocking  
silence, I fled into the forest at top speed.

It flew by in a haze, the pounding of my feet on the rocky terrain, the wind sweeping the hair from my face,  
the blur of my limbs as they pumped back and forth, pushing myself forward. Mostly, it passed so quickly because  
in retrospect, it was nothing. It was the calm before the storm, the eye of the hurricane, that brief period of release  
one experienced before the longest and most horrific battle of their lives. And as the forest thinned out and the rocky  
terrain turned to smooth winding road, I wish that I would have then realized that this journey was merely the eye of the storm.

And that release wasn't what waited for me inside the walls of Volterra, but instead the beginning of a devastating storm, which would alter the course of my existence entirely.

**...**

**A/N: This isn't my best so I completly welcome flames on this chapter...I just wanted to get this down while I had**

**It in my head... Thanks to those who reviewed my last chapter... Gold stars and Quizno cookies for you all...:D**


	3. Appeal

The pain was sudden, harsh, and relentless. The brash terror of it all consumed my entire body, but this unending pain didn't originate from my body alone, the nerves the muscles, it emanated out from my very core.

It felt as if my heart had been fractured into a million bits.

Again.

Her face was everywhere, but somehow it was nowhere, untouchable, unattainable. Just out of my grasp.

It haunted me, the heartbreak in her eyes, the disbelief pulling at her mouth, the blood draining from her face, as she whispered again and again, 'No.' And I felt less than nothing as the tears pooled in her eyes, the sorrow leaking, draining despair.

I opened my mouth to scream, tried to move my legs, fighting everything just to get to her, to stop the pain on my angel's face.

But it was inevitable; I could not reverse the damage I had done unto her. And on this thought she started to fade, and the pain receded to a dull throb.

The voices pulled me out of this misery.

'Jane, that might have been a bit, er, _excessive_, don't you think? A simple, 'What brings you here,' would have surely sufficed, no?'

There was no response, and my eyes fluttered open to reveal a room full of vampires staring upon my crippled form. I did my best to straighten myself out, and my eyes focused on Aro as he walked down towards me.

"Ah, Edward Cullen, it's a pleasure to see you.", but Aro's eyes were tight, and his mouth set in an odd relief.

For the first time since I left, I let the voices flood my head. I focused in on Aro, probing for his thoughts. He was, excited? I concentrated, and his voice echoed through my mind. "Such talent, such strength, I wonder if he has decided…"

Of course, He was hoping I would join his family, he was always hoping one of us would. I cut off the voices, before 'others' could intrude, and tried to focus on Aro's eyes before I answered.

"I have come, to ask a, well, favor of you." My voice trailed off and Aro's head cocked in wonderment.

Well Edward, proceed."

I took a deep breath, "I have come, to beg for you're mercy…" I looked at Aro with pleading eyes, and he seemed to understand. He reached out and placed his old weathered skin onto my arm.

Everything flooded before my eyes. The first time I smelled her, the overpowering _lust_ for her blood, which consumed every part of me, the monster it had made me. The way her hair fell over her shoulder creating a rich curtain around her ivory face, the at first unendurable control I had to yield whenever I was around her.

I remembered how she made me feel, how I almost felt, well alive. How my stomach turned and my unneeded breathing became erratic whenever she was close. How the blush warmed her cheeks whenever my lips brushed against her, love filling her warm chocolate eyes.

How in love I am with her.

And then came Jasper. The danger I put her in, the danger I was constantly putting her in. I couldn't do it to her. I couldn't put my everything at risk. I couldn't make my life go through the pain, the misery of being burdened with us.

I had to let her go.

And I remembered The Day. I remember my heart, my soul, my everything, being split in two, leaving the only real part of me behind, the only part of me that ever felt alive.

I remembered the empty months, only bearable by the thought of her safe, the thought of her happy.

And then the phone rang. Rosalie's voice, echoing my deadliest thoughts. I couldn't believe it, but as I called, desperate to be proven wrong, the unthinkable happened.

My Bella was gone.

Aro pulled away from me, enlightenment flooding his eyes. I whispered to him, using the last of my strength to talk without sobbing. I looked him straight in the eye.

"My life ended that day; I am only asking you to make it official."


End file.
